Finding the Joy again

Last year I realized I had to make some changes in the studio, from record-keeping issues, to dealing with my pack-rat tendencies to how I approached my painting.  I was going to paint only commissions and leave behind my other work, with few exceptions. 

Two out of three issues were dealt with successfully.  I hired a part-time office manager who has been a godsend and a delight.  Susan B. is the one who helped me get started on tackling my studio organization skills (see January blog) and I'm now proud to say my studio has been clutter free (ok, not for the compulsively tidy, but for ME it is) for two months.  On the business side, Susan is organizing all my scattered bits of info into a database.  What a time-consuming job it has turned out to be and I'm very happy to pay her to do it.  It has given me extra time to paint.

Concentrating only on commission work did not go so well.  I reached a point where I avoided going into the studio and when I got there, I'd paint a bit, then leave.  My heart wasn't in it.  Difficult commissions made it harder to find the enthusiasm.  I hit a block. My plan to complete commissions was backfiring.  I wanted to try some new work, but felt guilty if I didn't work on the commission pieces.   I didn't stop painting, but any artist will tell you that if you aren't with the painting, the work is awful.  So I hoped for inspiration and painted when I found it.

This weekend I began a new painting for a show at Riverview Gallery in Portsmouth. My friend and the co-owner Wayne will be celebrating 12 years in his space.  Since Wayne was the first person to afford gallery space to me that first year, I work with him on special occasion projects whenever I can.

Yes, I have commissions underway. But I wanted to do this for Wayne.  I had an image from an art opening, taken by my friend and photographer Lynda Richardson, that I wanted to paint.  Oh boy!  I had that drawn and in progress in just a few hours.  I was loving it.  ! The canvas was right, the image spoke to me, colors were happening and I suddenly realized what I had been missing this past year.  The joy.  The JOY in painting.  The sheer delight in seeing something happen that is totally mine....no collaborating, no input from someone else, no pressure to please a client or stress to finish, to move on to the next commission.  Just painting in the moment and NOT worrying about whether another person will like it or not.  I hope this translates back to the commissions, but I do know this; I can't give up painting for me.

( in progress)